Some of us may have heard the phrase which describe a person, “the good, bad and ugly”. Sadly, this a very judgmental, unhelpful and disrespectful way of labelling a person. It is absolutely UNACCEPTABLE.

According to psychologist Carl Rogers , every individual is born with much potential and capacity to learn, grow and be nurtured into a fine, mature and healthy adult. It really depends on whether the child receives a loving, warm, caring and nurturing family and social environment.

If a child grows up in a hostile and abusive environment, the emotionally sensitive child may be traumatized, emotionally wounded and hurting. When the adult person who has childhood trauma, gets hurt, the reaction is often fear of rejection and anger towards the person who is supposed to care and protect her or him.

Sometimes anger outburst may be seen as ” bad ” when it is NOT bad at all. It is a fearful response when feeling rejected or abandoned.

Dr. Richard Schwartz wrote an absolutely wonderful book called “NO bad Parts” which explains that every individual has different Parts in the Self. And every Parts serves a purpose to nurture and protect the Self and there are no unhelpful parts. For example some of us may the Good and Kind Parts, the Vulnerable Insecure Parts, the Prideful Parts or the Hurting and Emotionally Wounded Parts.

Therefore All Parts has a meaning of existence and serves a purpose. All we need is patience and curiosity to understand the Parts in another person we care for.